#    #    #   #    ###     ###     #    #      ##     ##### 
#    #    ##  #     #     #   #    #    #     #  #      #   
#    #    # # #     #     #        ######    ######     #   
#    #    #  ##     #     #   #    #    #    #    #     #   
 ####     #   #    ###     ###     #    #    #    #     #   
[Unichat log --]
(14:02)Arbiter: Well, I think I've done everything I can on the whole "trying to save MrE" front. It... didn't go as great as everything else I do. (judge-of-character is me using an alt account, by the way.) (Also that conversation with Theo happened in his private server so congratulations on getting to witness the D~I~V~I~N~E S~E~C~R~E~T~S contained within Theo's exclusive cool kids' club.)
(14:04)Arbiter: So, unless you guys have any means of ensuring Theo's troops don't suffer too many casualties, I don't think there's any more we can do to help MrE. Because MrE doesn't want to be saved, and Theo doesn't want to be not a [censored]. So, yeah. All this trying to do something actually productive has really drained me. I think I'm gonna go cheer on my best friend DOGFOODLID again. Sorry, DeepDark. That's about as concerted as my efforts can get.
(??:??)Xenocartographer: If it's any consolation, Wildcat's reported similar results on the Sonja front. This timeline may be in some considerable disarray...
(14:06)Arbiter: ...Wait. Hey, Xeno, did you have an actual timestamp next to your name back there? Are you in our timeline now?
(??:??)Xenocartographer: I haven't the foggiest notion what you're talking about, sorry.
(14:07)Arbiter: It's there in the log...
(??:??)Xenocartographer: Huh, so it is. Must be a glitch.
(14:08)System: User Wildcat is now ACTIVE.
(14:08)Wildcat: Ugh, Sonja...
(14:09)Arbiter: Do you have a log?
[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]
System: Incoming private message from user Wildcat:
(13:48)Wildcat: Sonja, this is going to sound weird, but I need you to trust me. Admiral Pancake is on the moon. One of his allies, "Silentconspirator" has replaced and impersonated the new IT engineer in order to get close to you. They intend to kidnap you. They want to use you and your friends as pawns in a twisted game of chess. If you need proof, this should be more than enough.
System: Incoming private message from user Wildcat:
(13:48)Wildcat: I will help you as much as I can, but it won't be much. It is critical that you don't tell anyone about me outside of your circle of four. No one.
SonjaOfTheMoon (friendly prince) has been slain!
System: Incoming private message from user Wildcat:
(13:48)Wildcat: And hey, Athena! It's an honor to meet you, take care of the moon girl for me will you?
/message reply You just killed me.
The match is ending... Hostile victory!
System: Incoming private message from user SonjaOfTheMoon:
(13:49)SonjaOfTheMoon: If it's any consolation, as far as I can tell, their build was highly optimized against ours, and they had extraordinary cohesion. I'm sure you suspect foul play as much as I do.
System: Incoming private message from user Wildcat:
(13:50)Wildcat: That's what I'm trying to prevent!
/message reply I was playing a game, my character died, we lost, and that was our final elimination round. If you're working for an enemy team to throw the tournament, congratulations.
System: Incoming private message from user Wildcat:
(13:52)Wildcat: I'm not.
/block Wildcat
[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]
(??:??)SecundaSonja: And... that's it. No timely temporal incursion to change the odds. What gives?
(??:??)pwnz0rz: idk
(??:??)pwnz0rz: iknow myslef pretty well and id totlly cheat ther if i could
(??:??)pwnz0rz: wlel not now
(??:??)pwnz0rz: im matuer and honest now gosh
(??:??)SecundaSonja: Mhm.
(??:??)SecundaSonja: So it looks like no one's contacted that pwnz0rz and Pancake's going to trust him after all. Can we use that? I mean, I'd rather he not have a time-traveling superweapon in the first place, but given that he does... well, you should have an easy enough time convincing yourself to play double agent.
(??:??)pwnz0rz: man, pwnz1 couldnt do it and im p sure hes biased that pwnz0rz against all other hims
(??:??)pwnz0rz: erm
(??:??)pwnz0rz: if he didtn belief that 1, y'd he beleaf others?
(??:??)SecundaSonja: Gods damn it, you're probably right.
(??:??)pwnz0rz: heh
(??:??)pwnz0rz: liek it or not, ithink weve gotta wait
(??:??)pwnz0rz: we're in the hands of an unknown........ something
(??:??)SecundaSonja: The other interlopers?
(??:??)pwnz0rz: yup
(??:??)pwnz0rz: accrording to shoutingconspinrator, pancakes been on hi alert ever since something she doenst know alot about
(??:??)pwnz0rz: so....... idk if this if the rite time 2 act against him????
(??:??)SecundaSonja: Mhm. I can see that, but if I have to sit on my aetheric [censored] much longer, I'm going to go stir-crazy. :/
[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]
(14:12)Arbiter: Yeah, that's bad.
(14:13)Dellis: So what do we do now? We can't just sit on our chat-themed [censored]s and wait for something to happen...
(14:14)Arbiter: I don't know, Dellis. I don't know.
[--------]
Leave a comment
[Unichat auxiliary records --]
Xenocartographer (Official Note): So, on the one hand, revealing yourself as a trans-fourth-wall cosmic stuff-doer seems better at getting you labeled a troll than actually getting the intended result. On the other hand, Sonja's going to remember this, and when it's proven right - well, we'll see what happens then.
Xenocartographer (Official Note): In other news, Seabiscuit has done yet more adorable fanart in honor of the comic's first anniversary! From left to right, chess instructor!MrE, Vampire and Rasputin, Pancake and special guest star silentconspirator, and OITHEOI, who I headcanon has the worst record. Gosh, I want this AU.
Seabiscuit: Sonja confirmed for GRUMP!
Omg. She's another one that totally deserves a "I told ya so!" PM... edit delete reply
Wildcat: I may not be able to resist the temptation. edit delete reply
Mini_coopa2: Well ive caught up now, looking great so far! edit delete reply
Mini_coopa2: Oh, yay grey. edit delete reply
Dellis: Welcome! Fresh additions for the conspiracy! We're growing and we CANNOT BE STOPPED!

(Unless by authcodes. Those we can kinda maybe crack. On good days. If we're lucky. Don't quote me on that.) edit delete reply
SansTheComic: yeah, i'm still stumped on the gaia one. edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: You can think of that authcode like the information-gathering equivalent of a boss battle. edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: Eesh, that grey is hard to read. Let's see if I can tweak the algorithm... edit delete reply
Dellis: I'm as confused as my in-comic ego.

Seems like DeepDark should capitalize on the fear Pancake and Silent have for him. The moment is NOW, the question is... How? edit delete reply
Wildcat: Perhaps the best thing for us to do at the moment is wait and gather information. Not knowing enough about basically anything has been a pretty big obstacle
I noticed on GoO's profile it says he sometimes hangs out in #officially-casual
Maybe we could get some insight into him that way? edit delete reply
Dellis: I agree, but the last lines in this comic makes me think there actually IS something we should be doing, the question is "what"? edit delete reply
Wildcat: the mapmaker did say something about finding out why Theo trusts the duck so much.... edit delete reply
Wildcat: We could also contact future Sonja and Pwnz. I'm not sure we should do much there, but letting them know we exist and trying to figure out what their goals/motivations are might be useful.
I don't know if we can trust them, but they seem likely to have reasonably good intentions for our kids edit delete reply
SansTheComic: ... to quote somebody, "that wood work beteter if we dindt have all teh time" edit delete reply
Wildcat: I'm going to test something
/message services coffeebot {size=12oz, flavor="vanilla" location="main lounge"}
/help edit delete reply
Turquoise: @SecundaSonja: I believe interlopers is a bit strong of a word for them. People hear words like 'superweapon' and 'new-world order' and start panicing. They just want to know what's going on. So if it would be alright, may I ask a question or 2? It'd probably help you from going str-crazy if nothing else.

Why is z0 a problem if they've already figured it out? I mean, unless z0 is forced into something they wouldn't do it if they didn't want to, right? edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: Is this intended as a PM? edit delete reply
Turquoise: Is that how it works? edit delete reply
SansTheComic: is this another one of those question chains with no answers? edit delete reply
Dellis: I believe it is intended as a PM, it just didn't use the usual syntax. edit delete reply
SansTheComic: all right, i have to ask. time travel. what exactly are the rules?! like. how does it work, can we send messages to any time we want, what happens in the case of paradox. we should *probably* figure out the basics first before acting on incomplete information. edit delete reply
Arbiter: The purplest page in Uni- oh, forget it. edit delete reply
[--------]
 
Unichat © Patrick Coffman | Hosted on ComicFury