#    #    #   #    ###     ###     #    #      ##     ##### 
#    #    ##  #     #     #   #    #    #     #  #      #   
#    #    # # #     #     #        ######    ######     #   
#    #    #  ##     #     #   #    #    #    #    #     #   
 ####     #   #    ###     ###     #    #    #    #     #   
[Unichat log --]
(13:24)OITHEOI: Rasputin.
(13:24)__RSPTN__: Theo! How you doing, buddy?
(13:24)OITHEOI: Not well. I think I need shatterpoint protection.
(13:25)__RSPTN__: Oooooooh. Who's the mark?
(13:25)OITHEOI: A warship.
(13:25)__RSPTN__: Oh, Theo. If you don't play along, I'm not going to help~
*(13:25)OITHEOI sighs.*
(13:26)OITHEOI: "Oh my God, Rasputin, you can't just assume I'm trying to murder people. Also you're sexy and I want your babies."
(13:26)__RSPTN__: Overdoing it a bit, but I'll take it.
(13:26)__RSPTN__: Why, may I ask, do you want to sink an unidentified warship? Just curious.
(13:27)OITHEOI: Gods wants me to, and that's the extent of what I know. But I think he's setting me up for failure for his own ends.
/message ThatOneVampChick Holy [censored], query me when you're up. Theo just [censored]ed up in the dumbest way, and he doesn't realize it.
(13:28)__RSPTN__: Ah, I see!
(13:28)__RSPTN__: Well, sure, I can help you out. Standard spiel, shatterpoint protection is only probabilistic, and you promise not to hold me accountable if the chrono-pressure backfires on you, blah blah blah.
(13:28)OITHEOI: I'm aware. It's not like anyone can hold you accountable for much of anything.
(13:29)__RSPTN__: Oh, Theo, you flatter me. Hm, what shall I ask for in return...
(13:29)OITHEOI: I don't have much of a military right now, not since the thrashing Pancake gave me at Fiji. I suppose I could give you codes to a silo or two.
(13:30)__RSPTN__: Nah, I'm good for missiles. But speaking of codes...
(13:30)__RSPTN__: I want the authcode for the wiki page on Pancake's conspiracy.
(13:31)OITHEOI: You know that code already.
(13:31)__RSPTN__: Sure, but I want proof that you know it, for... reasons.
(13:32)OITHEOI: What if I don't?
(13:32)__RSPTN__: Then I'm afraid I can't help you.
(13:32)OITHEOI: Why do you care whether or not I can access that particular page?
/log encrypt --stealth
(13:33)System: The log for this anonymous channel is being encrypted with __RSPTN__'s public key. Stealth mode: suppressing this message from everyone besides you and server ops.
(13:33)__RSPTN__: Oh, I don't, but there's someone else who does.
(13:34)OITHEOI: Aaaahhh! Okay, fine, here's a compromise. I'll transmit the first three words of the code. That gives your contact reasonable certainty and me decently plausible deniability.
(13:34)__RSPTN__: Deal.
/log no-encrypt --stealth
(13:34)System: Further messages in this channel are no longer being encrypted. Stealth mode: suppressing this message from everyone besides you and server ops.
(13:35)OITHEOI: "very little gravitas"
(13:36)__RSPTN__: Thank you kindly!
Leave a comment
[Unichat auxiliary records --]
Xenocartographer (Official Note): I worry a little bit that the significance of this page might get lost in authcode theorizing. Oh well...
Arbiter: "(13:25) __RSPTN__ sighs" Why did Raspy sigh, since Theo was the one who was being forced to demean himself? Is this a typo, or did I misunderstand what the sigh meant? edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: Woops, my bad. edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: -SNERK-... That first quote... Omfg.. "Someone else who does"... Hehe, us?;) Or mystery admin... Hmmm.
Gosh, I didn't realize it before but I love seeing these two together already! He doesn't tease him like Pancake, I notice~ edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: -hacker voice-

I'M IN!! edit delete reply
Arbiter: "very little gravitas" Hmm... Weird code. But, if I did manage to guess the full authcode and input it in the right box back on Page 69, would I be able to access the page in question? The tantalizing morsel of L O R E hangs so close to my face... edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: What do you do when you want to know something on the Internet?~ edit delete reply
Arbiter: Right now, it looks like "cry and bow down in awe to your superior puzzle skills." I got the reference, or at least I thought I did, but the obvious answer doesn't seem to be working. Am I getting screwed by capitalization or something, or is the answer simply more devious than it would seem? edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: I'm gonna defer this one to the peanut gallery. Help a fan out! Y'all can crack this! edit delete reply
Dellis: Cracked! Unrelenting patience and unflinching fan determination always win the race XD

... And my feeble victory just gave MORE QUESTIONS! I hate you in a loving sort of way, Xeno.

I should avoid revealing anything not to spoil other fans' experience, right? Is it okay to give hints to those who request them? I should give them in private though... We should make a cracker subforum. Proposed name: "Conspiracy of Readers" xD

... Or "Vague Omnipresent Council", courtesy of DefinetelyNotAnUmbrella and his PM to Pancake. Positively ominous! XD edit delete reply
Dellis: Apologies for the wall of "DellisColor" I'm leaving here, but...

I read the second paragraph of the hidden page. WHAT?!?!?

(I read the last one too. Hmm...) edit delete reply
KittenLicks: Hey Arbiter!

It is case sensitive, if you haven't figured it out yet. If I were you, I'd just try all combinations of Upper~Case, lower_case and inbetween-things. edit delete reply
Arbiter: I second the subforum idea. edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: Hahahaha, I just had help, I am pitiful at this~ ;^; edit delete reply
Dellis: A magical fairy whose job is to complete things told me the six letter last word of the code, but I get bad authcode errors nonetheless. Maybe there's more digging to do. edit delete reply
KittenLicks: Got in, and side note, I long for the day when history books are filled with names like this.

"On that day in 2017, Xenocartographer mapped the seven seas, allowing future travellers to venture there aided by his maps. Later, Seabiscuit would travel by sea to distribute confectionery all around the world.

KittenLicks napped during this period." edit delete reply
Arbiter: Well, thanks Dellis and KittenLicks. I finally got in. Although, I must say, testing the number of possible capitalization and spacing permutations of a phrase is a task better suited to a computer than a human being. And now every time I type the letter v into a text box, my phone pops up with a set of nearly identical recommendations the length of my forearm. edit delete reply
Arbiter: Oops, left this comment in the wrong thread. Sorry. Written characters have lost all meaning now, so it's hard to tell where the indents are. edit delete reply
Dellis: I have the same problem.

Almost surrendered at the seventh try. But the eighth did the charm.

On a side note, I was SURE there had to be tildes in there. C'mon Xeno! We know you love tildes! I SHARE that love! How could you betray the tilde in favor of that other symbol! edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: ... -SNERK- 50/10, amaze~ edit delete reply
KittenLicks: Also, psst, Xeno:


"*** ********* was ****** ********* **** a numer of *********** *****."

typo alert. :3 edit delete reply
endsoftime: I should really keep better track of this comic! I apparently missed some pretty big things, wow
Can't wait to try to (and probably fail) to stumble my way onto the authcodes.
I love solving puzzles and finding patterns, even if I'm not that great at it. Actually, and not to boast, I am pretty great at it. I just tend to latch onto the wrong things :| edit delete reply
Unichat © Patrick Coffman | Hosted on ComicFury