#    #    #   #    ###     ###     #    #      ##     ##### 
#    #    ##  #     #     #   #    #    #     #  #      #   
#    #    # # #     #     #        ######    ######     #   
#    #    #  ##     #     #   #    #    #    #    #     #   
 ####     #   #    ###     ###     #    #    #    #     #   
Updates Wednesday and Saturday at 8:30 PM EST
[Unichat log --]

(09:40)Anarchon: Hello.

(09:41)metampsychotic: hey

(09:41)metampsychotic: do you know who i am?

(09:42)Anarchon: You know things you can't know.

(09:43)metampsychotic: yes

(09:43)metampsychotic: how did you know that?

(09:44)Anarchon: I also know things I can't know.

(09:44)Anarchon: I am a very bad person and this is my punishment.

(09:45)Bulwark: That's not true!!

(09:45)Anarchon: Yes it is.

(09:45)metampsychotic: then does that make me a very bad person too?

(09:49)Anarchon: Who are you?

(09:50)metampsychotic: well

(09:50)metampsychotic: my name is erica

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

09:50 AM Anarchon The girl in yellow is real. Her name is Erica.

09:50 AM pwnz0rz huh???

09:51 AM Anarchon I know your dreams, Luke. It's okay. I haven't told my sister.

09:51 AM pwnz0rz ...

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]
[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

9:54 AM | DrHorrible | I can tell you what Etamnanki is.

9:54 AM | TA_DAIMONIA | Pancake's wunderweapon? What do you know?

9:55 AM | DrHorrible | I don't actually know what it is.

9:55 AM | DrHorrible | But I'm about to.

9:57 AM | DrHorrible | This is going to sound crazy.

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

(09:55)Bulwark: Why does that sound familiar?

(09:55)Anarchon: It's a conspiracy theory.

(09:56)metampsychotic: no! D:

(09:56)metampsychotic: well, yes

(09:56)metampsychotic: but did you know the term "conspiracy theory" was originally made up to discredit whistleblowers???

(09:57)metampsychotic: look, this is going to sound crazy, but it's real

(09:58)Bulwark: What is it?

(09:58)Anarchon: Supposedly it was a wunderweapon against Gaia powered by orphans.

(09:58)metampsychotic: okay the orphans part is probably [censored]

(09:58)metampsychotic: ...

(09:59)metampsychotic: i HOPE it's [censored]

(10:00)metampsychotic: so ok

(10:00)metampsychotic: the really crazy thing (I'M SORRY YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO WORK WITH ME HERE)

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

10:00 AM Anarchon She knows the truth about Gaia.

/message Bulwark ithink ur bro is of hiss meds

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

10:00 AM | DrHorrible | Gaia is real.

10:01 AM | DrHorrible | I guess that's why I keep having these dreams.

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

(10:00)metampsychotic: ...is that gaia exists

(10:00)metampsychotic: etamnanki is, uh

(10:00)metampsychotic: it WAS a research project that wanted to talk to it

(10:00)metampsychotic: it's also... the place where it lives?? we're still a little fuzzy on the details

(10:01)Bulwark: Who is "we"?

(10:01)metampsychotic: heh

(10:02)metampsychotic: no one in particular :( me, luke, EP, sonja, EP's roommate and her friend

(10:02)metampsychotic: and some like

(10:02)metampsychotic: mysterious internet people?

(10:03)metampsychotic: uhm

(10:03)metampsychotic: ana, hannah said you wanted to talk to me

(10:04)Anarchon: Yes.

(10:05)Anarchon: I want to know why.

(10:05)metampsychotic: why?

(10:06)Anarchon: Yes.

(10:06)metampsychotic: i'm not sure i totally understand D:

(10:08)Anarchon: Why the universe decided I had to be a bad person.

(10:09)metampsychotic: uhm

(10:09)metampsychotic: i don't think you're a bad person?

(10:09)metampsychotic: i think you got put through a bunch of trauma in a row and it's hard to make sense of

(10:10)metampsychotic: but that's normal!!!

(10:10)metampsychotic: uhm

(10:10)metampsychotic: not being put through trauma but being [censored] up by it? that's normal

(10:12)Anarchon: This is a waste of my time.

(10:12)metampsychotic: no!!!

(10:13)metampsychotic: hannah please talk to him D:

(10:13)Bulwark: On it.

(10:22)System: User Anarchon has been idle for 10 minutes - setting status to AWAY.

(10:23)System: You have been idle for 10 minutes - setting status to AWAY.

(10:23)System: User Bulwark has been idle for 10 minutes - setting status to AWAY.

(10:24)System: User Anarchon is now ACTIVE.

(10:24)Anarchon: Don't tell me how I feel.

(10:24)metampsychotic: sorry :(

(10:25)metampsychotic: uhm

(10:25)metampsychotic: so i know what luke told me he saw happened

(10:25)metampsychotic: but i'd like to get your side of the story too

(10:25)metampsychotic: if that's alright

(10:27)Anarchon: Bad things would happen if I went to school, so I didn't. The bad things found me instead.

(10:27)Anarchon: They took me away at gunpoint. They killed all the car tires so no one could follow them. They killed the telephones so they couldn't call for help.

(10:28)Anarchon: I was alone.

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

Wait.

Not much else you can do, now. The van trundles along. You can hear your captors chatting in the cab, but you can't make out what they're saying. It doesn't sound like English.

Through the window, you see the apartments and mailboxes of your town give way to empty fields, then trees. You are absolutely alone.

[--------]
 
 
[Unichat log --]

(10:30)Anarchon: They took me to a warehouse. And they made me do things. Fight things, dodge things, avoid things, solve things.

(10:30)Anarchon: Some of the things were puzzles. They told me I would die if I didn't solve them.

(10:30)Anarchon: Some of the things were predators. They gave me a knife. I don't like violence.

(10:30)Anarchon: I learned it.

(10:30)Anarchon: And once I learned it, they let me go.

(10:31)Anarchon: I want to know why. Why did they want to break me?

(10:31)Anarchon: Why did they want to make me like this?

(10:33)metampsychotic: ana

(10:33)metampsychotic: i know this is hard but i need you to think back very carefully

(10:33)metampsychotic: you were in elementary school and you had to fight things with a knife?

(10:34)Anarchon: Yes.

(10:34)metampsychotic: and you survived?

(10:34)Anarchon: Unfortunately.

(10:34)metampsychotic: uhm

(10:35)metampsychotic: try to be objective about this one, what would you put your odds of survival at?

(10:35)Anarchon: Very very low.

(10:36)Anarchon: The universe didn't want me taking the easy way out.

(10:36)metampsychotic: oh g-d

(10:36)metampsychotic: not another one

(10:37)Anarchon: What?

(10:37)metampsychotic: okay

(10:37)metampsychotic: you know how gaia is real? it has things called shatterpoints, which are events that it really wants to happen

(10:37)metampsychotic: if something were to happen that makes them impossible, it intervenes

(10:38)metampsychotic: if you're involved with a shatterpoint... and the gaians tried to kill you, they'd fail

(10:39)System: User Bulwark is now ACTIVE.

(10:39)Bulwark: Why would the Gaians try to kill someone necessary to their own god's plans?

(10:40)metampsychotic: because if he's necessary they'll fail

(10:40)metampsychotic: so if they fail, they can use him to learn what it wants

(10:40)metampsychotic: i am so, so sorry

[--------]
Leave a comment
[Unichat auxiliary records --]
Xenocartographer (Official Note): HE
Xenocartographer (Official Note): Okay, in other news, sorry for the unplanned hiatus there. Life was being a dick, and then I got sick.
Xenocartographer: In OTHER other news, I'm not particular sold on the formatting in the second log (which, naturally, is going to come up again when we visit that timeline). Let me know what you think? I'm leaving this as a regular comment so y'all can reply to it. edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: "Let me know what you think? I'm leaving this as a regular comment so y'all can reply to it."


Haha, I know I told you it kinda ran together but now it too much space
Maybe use like [ ] 's? I don't think any other format has used those yet unless my mind be dumb edit delete reply
Arbiter: I don’t know if this is intentional but the font size for the usernames in that log look really small to me, that might just be because I’m on mobile though. If that is intentional, in my opinion it doesn’t really look right, I don’t think you should mess with the font size. Maybe try italicizing instead?

Looks like I was right about the Gaians testing for shatterpoints. I wonder if that really is the reason behind all of their acts of terrorism too. edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: What the hell? Nothing in the CSS mentions font size at all. edit delete reply
Arbiter: It seems to happen a lot for some reason, this isn’t the first time I’ve seen Unichat text get weirdly small. It happened to me when I tried to post that link and failed miserably a year ago. Normally it fixes itself if you reload the page, but that doesn’t seem to be working here.
image edit delete reply
Arbiter: OH SHIT I ACTUALLY GOT IT TO DISPLAY edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: Should be resolved now. edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: Haha, I was confused so I looked on my phone and yup, tiny. But normal in browser. It's almost like the spaces smashed them down. edit delete reply
CONNECT 1200: Looks fine if viewed on an X11 browser but would the TTY-only folks really want those tabs? (I probably wouldn't if I had to use a 24×80 VT-100-like thing. Then again, they've probably got bigger screens.) edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: They do have larger screens - large enough to fit the ASCII art banner, at least. ;) edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: Cruelest mapmaker


Also, I ship it edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: META AND ANA YOU WRINKLED PAPER edit delete reply
Arbiter: Pwnzarchon is OTP. edit delete reply
SansTheComic: ok, another timeline coming into the mix. recorded. into the deep end we go. edit delete reply
Pixelknight: The whole timeline thing is starting to become verryy complicated... I don't think i know what's going on anymore. Can somebody give me like... A refresher course or something? edit delete reply
Seabiscuit: Well, on this page we've got "our" timeline, the timeline where Pancake runs the world, and now a new timeline we don't know anything about except that Meta doesn't seem to exist


Also the thought of the kids playing dwarf fortress is hilarious edit delete reply
SansTheComic: i made a summary for this exact thing ^-^ anyway, we don't actually know much about this spacey timeline yet, so just wait i guess. edit delete reply
Pixelknight: And speaking of which, if Doom can't work because their computers can't define|generate|whatever the graphics. Why not a simulation focused game? Like... Dwarf Fortress? edit delete reply
Pixelknight: I just realized, the whole dwarf fortress thing might actually contribute to the plot.

Dwarf Fortress is not a very demanding game when it comes to graphics. But processing power? You need a lot of that. Like... A lot a lot.

Giving them Dwarf Fortress might give us an idea of how powerful their computers are at actually simulating stuff. edit delete reply
CONNECT 1200: Good enough for computational physics + good enough to run an artificial personality on a handheld == good enough for pretty much anything.


You don't really need a separate graphical hardware if you have this much system memory and CPU processing power. (In fact, the first games to ever use GPUs looked better when run without them. All those cylindrical heads with face bitmaps glued onto them... yuck...) edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: Here's the thing, though: Both of those utilize @hena, which is tied to Etamnanki. It doesn't necessarily generalize to conclusions about normal computation. Put it another way, Pancake can run personality sims without needing a computer at all after the simulation is initialized - the conspirators aren't cyborgs. edit delete reply
CONNECT 1200: Still, the non-@hena core just cannot be worse than 80386. Not even with Intel folks designing it. It's got to run a (most likely) POSIX OS, and this means an advanced instruction set and quite a lot of raw processing power. '386 was the first Intel processor capable of running unix-likes, which sets the lower threshold right here. Coincidently, it's more or less reproducible on the chip-making machinery still more or less working in Russia, too, so it absolutely fits the story as we know it so far.


And yes, it ran Doom. Not full-screen, IIRC, and with a miserable framerate, but it was playable.


(Wonder how far we'd go if the imps were commanded by a virtual instance of Silent, though. "Not really" seems to be a fair guess.) edit delete reply
Xenocartographer: No, I'm not saying you're wrong, just that you're right for the wrong reasons. There should definitely be a higher level of technology in the setting, and y'all are probably close to figuring out why. edit delete reply
[--------]